Our first two years in this city were so hard. A hardness I couldn't have prepared for, a hardness that we're both still not sure how we managed to survive. I know I can speak for Mike when I say we both felt isolated, terribly alone, out of place. We worked our tails off to make a cruddy rat-hole a cozy home, but we didn't have a family to share it with. Yes, we had each other and our animals, thank goodness. But, and I can't speak for Michael on this, I am used to having a huge family of relatives and friends that I can surround myself with at any time of day or night. But in New York? There wasn't anyone.
Yet.
It takes a long time to forge the kinds of relationships that become like family, whether you are blood related or not. That was not something I understood until I moved across the country. It has really helped that Adam, one of my very closest chosen family members, moved here in September. But it has also helped that we've been here a while and the people who were strangers two years ago, are friends we've known for two years now.
Lately I just haven't felt so alone. Or isolated. And certainly not out of place. Our shiny, new apartment is almost always full of people, laughter, and music. Cocktails flow freely and the food is always delicious and we always stay up much later than we should. And I am so, so, so grateful for that.
I picked this photo because even I can see the happiness on my face here. Mike and I did not know the photo was being taken, so what's captured is a totally genuine moment. And I realize that it looks like I am strangling my husband, but really what I am doing is scratching under his chin, something that both of us think the other couldn't possibly love as much as we do. But we both love it. Oh, how we love it.
07.08.09
3 comments:
I've loved all your posts lately so so much. It makes me miss NY far too much (and I've only been gone about a month and a half) It also makes me want to see this beautiful apartment of yours, just because it's all so exciting and you're so in love with it! New places are exciting ANYway... Oh! Remember, I am a free dog sitter. Anytime. :)
Eep, I never said "you're welcome" on your last post :). I was on a train and then a plane-except for the plane part.
I can identify with this. When I moved to San Diego I spent most of my time in a (very expensive) room and everyone I knew was one hundred and twenty miles away. I was feeling too anti-social to make friends, but social enough that I wanted friends. It was a bad time. The only thing that made it better was Chris coming down every weekend.
While I may not have a group of friends like you do now, I still have people. And it is so much better than not having people!
Tell me the ten days you are out of NY and I will be there, playing with your adorable dogs.
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