Chiremlin: The Original Hellhound

Dear friends,

I often refer to my little Hellhound, Satan's Lap Dog and the Chiremlin. In case you were wondering, I'm talking about my little mutt. She's a sweet dog, only about 15 pounds, some broken teeth and missing toenails... she lived on the streets for goodness knows how long before she was picked up by Los Angeles Animal Control. She spent over a month in the pound and then she came to live with us. She stank, she was soaked in urine and she had huge, saggy nipples. And bald patches. You can see why we were so enamored. She has a penchant for eating poop, growling at dinner guests and attacking the ankles of innocent sidewalk-walkers. When she plays she makes these horrible, amazing noises in her throat - she sounds like she's in the midst of a cold-blooded murder. We have no idea what kind of dog she is or what she's mixed with... we suspect there is some Chihuahua in there somewhere, and most definitely some Gremlin. We're sure she's part Gremlin because we once fed her after midnight and then these weird balls of fur exploded out of her back and bounced all around and turned into these gross slimy cacoons... and.. well... then we moved to NYC. We left the cacoons in the attic of our little bungalow on St. Andrews Place.... we're hoping they just turn into pretty butterflies and fly away into the sunset, but we're not so sure. That's why she's the Chiremlin. She's a Chihuahua-Gremlin mix. If you hear a howling in the night.... lock your doors. It prolly means Satan's Lap Dog got out.

;-)